On May 22nd Jon and I found out we were pregnant. We were both working from home, having an extremely normal and kinda slow day. I had been charting my temperature and that morning I noticed an extra spike. Sometimes this can be a sign of pregnancy, so I was suspicious as soon as I woke up. We had had a couple of other "suspicious" moments so I didn't think too much of it. Before lunchtime, I decided to run to Target to "return some pants" and also picked up a pack of pregnancy tests. Got home, ate lunch, and snuck up to our bathroom while Jon was still working. I honestly wasn't expecting a positive, but as I sat there staring at the test it almost immediately turned positive. I think what transpired after that was something like lightheadedness, extreme joy, fuzzy eyesight, disbelief, and a kind of floating feeling all the way to the door frame of Jon's office.
Just as a side-note, Jon and I agreed that I would be able to take a test whenever I wanted and have the opportunity to tell him in my own way. Ideally, this moment in my mind was poetic, romantic, and perfect. The reality was, I sat on the couch, asked him to sit with me, looked at him for 2-seconds, and blurted out with a shaky voice, "I'm PREGNANT!" I immediately went into a fit of crying, shaking, and laughing. Jon held me, prayed for us, teared up himself, and we celebrated together. It suddenly became our biggest and craziest secret. I was only 3.5 weeks along at the time I found out, so we had a lot of waiting to do before telling friends and family. We had no idea how difficult it would be to keep our secret...
Almost immediately I started reading pregnancy books and downloading apps and learning like crazy. I tried to be realistic about the risks during early pregnancy, but I'll be completely honest with you and say I was attached the moment I saw the double-lines on the test. My heart was full of love for this teeny tiny thing inside of me. We prayed everyday for the little baby-do and each week that passed by made us feel like it was more real and that he/she was healthy and growing. Even now, being only 12 weeks along, we're still worried, but holding onto hope and God's plan for us. We've decided to be thankful and let ourselves experience joy and try not to worry too much. I can do my best to take care of myself and do everything I need to do, and that's the best I can do. I feel peaceful about that, no matter what happens.
We had several long weeks to wait for our first appointment at 8 weeks and in the meantime, the symptoms began. I learned a couple of interesting things during my first trimester. I learned that pregnancy gives you a deep, dark, empty pit of hunger. I was ALWAYS hungry, yet I felt nauseous over the thought of most food. I would eat a meal and nearly 2-3 hours later, BAM, more hunger. I often referred to myself as an eternally hungry, vampire-zombie, which are highly emotional creatures and need Lucky Charms NOW. I learned that morning sickness is a lie from the pits of
hello kitty. It's usually all day, or at night, or sporadically here and there or in the middle of the night...In the words of Shakira, "Whenever, wherever, we're meant to be together, I'll be there and you'll be near..." Matter of fact, most mornings I felt my best! I learned that trying to train yourself to sleep on your left side makes you want to do everything BUT sleep on your left side. I learned that the gummy prenatal vitamins that I enjoyed before getting pregnant suddenly looked and tasted repulsive. I also learned that pregnancy can zap all spunk, energy, entrepreneurial spirit, and motivation right out of you. There were many days of feeling like a 500 pound, ninety-year-old woman who wishes for the energy to browse around Target or go grab a pudding cup but only has enough "ummph" to select the next episode of "How I Met Your Mother" on Netflix. Reading that the first trimester can often be the most difficult part of pregnancy made me do my best to treasure it AND really look forward to the second trimester. :) Building a baby is hard-work. It's OK to give yourself some mercy, rest, and a freezer full of popsicles.
Some of my favorite memories from the first trimester have been telling our friends and family and remembering their priceless reactions, buying our first baby book and stuffed animal, window shopping for baby stuff with my mom, thinking about nursery ideas, pinning baby stuff like a crazy person (see the evidence here), resting, being taken care of by a sweet and loving husband, seeing how excited Jon is, and seeing our little one on the ultrasound for the first time wiggling away. :)
We're feeling so blessed and excited about being 12 weeks along. We get to hear the heartbeat this Thursday and can't wait!! I honestly can't believe it's already been 12 weeks. It's going by so fast!! In the meantime, we are house hunting and racing against the clock to find a place we love, move in, and put a nursery together before Little Wallace makes an appearance in February. We're feeling confident and good about all of these changes. Can't wait to share more baby and house hunting stuff with you along the way. :) I'm excited to share my first trimester "survival kit" with you next week!
Disclaimer: Please note that my diaries about pregnancy reflect my own personal thoughts and experiences. Every pregnancy is different for every woman. If you have any questions about my experiences so far, please feel free to ask! Thanks so much for reading, friends. :)